Sex Positions for Overweight People
Years of exposure to media that feels like it’s been conceived both by and for skinny people has morphed contemporary society’s very narrow set of beauty standards. Now, anyone who’s not extremely thin or athletically fit can feel like they’re overweight.
Even a very confident person can feel self-conscious when it comes to being naked and sexual with a partner, especially if their body shape makes certain sex positions tricky to attempt. If you’re constantly worrying about things like that, you’re not going to be in a relaxed and sexy mood.
The truth is, when it comes to having sex, having a bigger body just means there’s more of you to love. That’s why a list of helpful sex positions put together specifically for bigger people can assist in putting you and your partner at ease. Not to mention, it’ll give you both some fun new options to play with.
Whether you’re a bit on the bigger side, your partner is, or you both are, these are options that take bodies into account that need a bit more space and support than the couples that sex position lists target.
There are also some product suggestions to really help you both take things to the next level.
1. Sofa Seduction
Sexologist Dr. Megan Stubbs recommends giving your bed a break and taking your lovemaking out onto your much sturdier couch to get the deed done. “If you have a couch with a long armrest, bend your partner over it and spread their legs,” says Stubbs. “In this position, much of your partner’s body weight is being held up by the couch and you have direct access to her. This can be an erotic position for oral and penetrative sex.
2. Reverse Cowgirl Cushion
You likely already know the pros of the view that come with doing it in this position. But you may not be aware that reverse cowgirl also has benefits for bigger couples. “The reverse cowgirl also works great for couples whose male partner has a large belly,” says Chrystal Bougon, founder of Curvy Girl Inc. points out. “If she looks at his toes, she can lean forward and then his belly does not get in the way. Plus, it’s easier for her to move up and down, and back and forth in that position.” Dealing with a height difference too? Add a pillow for leverage. “If his partner is shorter, they can put pillows where her legs would be so she can get up off of his penis and move up and down better,” says Bougon.
3. Modified Missionary
According to sex expert Jacqui Olliver, a few switch-ups to the classic missionary position make it ideal for more plus-size partners. “The best sexual position to use if either partner is overweight is a modification to a common missionary position,” she says. “The easiest way to visualize this position is to imagine the male in a push-up position. He then bends his knees so they are resting on the bed taking his lower body weight, then bends his elbows so his forearms are balancing the rest of his weight.” Plus, it’s customizable based on how much extra weight you’re packing. “He can adjust the bend in his knees depending on the belly size of himself and his partner,” says Olliver. “The bigger either partner is, the more he increases the bend in his knees. This position gives both partner’s ease of movement while being up close and personal, so an easy rhythm can be achieved for their mutual fulfillment.” But will she like it? Olliver says that doing it this way comes with a few key advantages for your lady. “Women like this position because they can feel and enjoy the closeness of their male without feeling squashed,” she says. “If either partner loses weight, the male simply reduces the amount of bend in his knees.
4. The Standing Pretzel
The struggle is real, as proven by Reddit users who have shared what has worked for them when it comes to sex positions that are great for heavier people. One suggestion? A vibrating cock ring, and a modified version of the pretzel sex position. In the standard pretzel position, she lies on her right side. Then, you’d straddle her right leg and lift her left so that it’s curled around the side of you. “I’m pretty fat, my girlfriend isn’t at all,” writes one Reddit user. “But to make it worse, I’m below average in length ‘down there.’ We can’t do missionary either and it sucks. We spend most of the time with her on top, grinding onto me, while I also wear a vibrating cock ring. However, one thing that has worked is ‘the pretzel,’ but with her on her side near the edge of the bed with me still straddling her leg as it partially hangs off. Basically I’m able to reach my furthest when standing up.”
5. Splitting Queens
Don’t underestimate the power of the pillow. “One of the key requirements for great sex is to make sure everyone is comfortable,” says Stubbs. “For people with bigger bodies, the addition of pillows may be just what they need. With a pillow, you can prop up your partner’s hips to make penetration easier. You can also use a pillow to brace your partner’s body so that there is less strain on their body.” Here’s how to use pillows to create a brand new position. “In bed, use multiple pillows to brace your partner’s legs so that they are wide open in a V shape,” she says. “The pillows will reduce the strain on the legs and you will be presented with a front row view of her sweetest spot. Don’t forget a pillow under her hips, too!”
6. Sex In A Sling
If one or both of you need a little more support, using a sex sling to keep certain body parts raised will help get the job done. “A sex sling can help if both partners have larger tummies,” Bougon explains. “She will be able to keep her legs in the air longer while he is inside of her, and the straps of the sling can give them both more momentum — and it can help keep him from worrying about his belly.”
7. Edging On The Bed
Reddit user throwaway710952 recommends that women with larger partners can use this position to their advantage. “If you have a high enough bed or can make it higher somehow, you can lay on your back with your hips just over the edge of the bed,” he suggests to the ladies. “He can stand and go straight into you while he either holds your legs or you rest them on his shoulders or wrap them around him. His belly will be completely out of the way, plus he won’t need to hold himself up.”
8. Doggy Style On Hind Legs
There are plenty of benefits to doing it like they do on the discovery channel. Especially for the ladies, since this position allows for front wall stimulation — upping the chance you’ll hit her G-spot. “This is definitely one of the easiest to try, and the one you should experiment with,” says sex educator Rita Delgado. “The woman is on hands and knees in this position, which allows the man to enter from behind while kneeling behind her. But he can also be standing on the floor, with the woman in the bed, if this makes it easier.” To up your comfort level even more, using a doggy style strap will further help your cause.
9. Midnight Snack
One way to overcome bedroom anxiety is to take things out of the bedroom all together. Doing it in the kitchen can provide a much-needed change of scene — plus access to a handy prop that’ll help you achieve deeper penetration. “Use your kitchen step stool to position your partner’s leg on for sex,” Stubbs explains. “This eliminates the need for your partner to hold their leg up in the air or for you to hold the limb. This trick can be used for face to face or facing away sex.” Not to mention, doing it in the kitchen is very convenient for when the two of you are done working up an appetite.
10. The Elevated Starfish
If you’re carrying around a few extra pounds, you don’t want to attempt the normal starfish — where the woman lays flat on her stomach and the guy lays on top of her, and enters her while sprawled out on top. But Matt, 26, says that a modified version of the starfish has been his go-to way of pleasing his woman. “I have her lay out on the bed butt up, down by the end of the bed,” he says. “She’s short so she’s not awkwardly standing; she’s just got her legs hanging off kind of. I give it to her standing up, which takes my gut out of the equation. Plus it’s easier than doggy-style because I’m not putting extra weight on my knees, or leaning my body over her, which would end up hitting the top of her anyway.”